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Clomid Round 3 v.3

June 17, 2009

The title is only partially right since there isn’t much going on at this point in my cycle- at least not physically.  I will list here though some of what I felt through out the day so I have a record- just in case.

Today was crazy. I felt like I was having hot flashes, and when the temperature outside is 95 the flashes are more than just a little bit uncomfortable. No sore breasts (last cycle they were crazy sensitive) but they have done their customary filling out- I swear I am such a full C that in my luteal phase I have to wear D’s (I know way too much info, but since I am listing my issues I feel as though the observation is appropriate). My coffee made me nauseous this morning and I couldn’t even finish it (make me way sad). I had a headache but I think that was more due to the fact that I was really late in my med dosage today combined with my lack of java. I got all caught up in making the grocery list and what stores I needed to hit up before I ran drove to the hospital to pick up meds from the special order pharmacy.  The guy, Sean is his name, asked me how the supps were workin and I told him that next Friday was the day.  I told him that he would know since I’d have to order the progesterone supps for the duration of the first tri-mester.

Side Note: I think it is kind of sad that I can walk into any pharmacy on this post and they know me.  They ask me how my other appointments are going, if results are in, etc. My grandma joked that all my friends here are my doctor’s and their various assistants.  Its true though.  I don’t even need to show my identification card anymore.  Back to the physical…

I must say that with supps attempting to track CM is pointless.  I take mine at night and I must say that I think it is working quite well.  I don’t know how women who use it during the day function!

That is really about it.

Now emotionally things are up and down.  Today started out badly. I don’t know what I was dreaming about but my very first thought when I was “I am going to make a sucky parent”.

How irrational.  The panic and the fear were there though in a way that is new for me. At the commissary today I got one of those baggers who just doesn’t know how to say the right thing.  I must say that I am a bit (ha!) bloated at this point so I am wearing a rather lose shirt.  I expect people to think “I wonder if she is pregnant” but I certainly do not expect to be asked about it.  Not only asked, but then the prying that came after my answer.

She asked me the question with a smile- like the only possible answer is yes. When I told her no she then asks me if I have recently had a baby.

HELLO SHERLOCK! The middle of the day on a WEDNESDAY- doesn’t she think that if I had a child (especially a baby) said child would be WITH me?!

So I just tell her that its the medications I am on and she then asks me what medicines!  I just ignored her at that point.  Her tip certainly wasn’t as generous as is the norm for me.  Though the difference I gave to a woman in need so I feel good. When I get home I look in the bags and the dimwit didn’t even pack things correctly!  I wasn’t in a good mood at all and poor Hubbs had to deal with it.  It was so bad that he decided he would go take a nap (which at this point I believe will last the rest of the night LOL).

Anyway, on to some good things.  I must say that opening my fridge and seeing my grapes, cherries, feta cheese, goat cheese, water, juices makes me happy.  Our pantry is what one would call “loaded”. I make sure we have sufficent canned food(veggies, meats, fish and rice) to last us at least a couple of weeks if things get hairy in any particular pay period (not to mention easy for the Man to make for himself when I am not up to making a meal).  I do love my fresh fruits and dairies though.  At the end of pay periods the fridge is usually empty and sad looking- though it is ideal for keeping it clean!

Today they had some good lookin kiwi and asparagus so I got those things as well (we LOVE roasted asparagus with salt and pepper as a snack!)  I chose a great day to go too!  Hardly anyone in there since the pay day rush had passed.  It is a much more enjoyable experience.

Today I went into Babies-R-Us to see if my friend had registered there as of yet and they were having a sale! Oh my Lord! So many cutie things and I had to put some back to stay inside my budget.  It was just $25 so I didn’t think I would be able to get much.  I also wanted to price  christening dresses for my niece, and there were gorgeous ones there!  Anyway, with the sale I ended up getting SIX full outfits for Beebee!  I was/am very excited about a great deal. The Hubbs made the observation that maybe I am projection shopping- meaning I am shopping for her but wishing it was for us.  I understand how he can say that but in all honesty I’ve just picked up little things here and there that were on sale and never once wished it were for us.  I think maybe that has more to do with me not thinking it is ever going to happen for us- which I think in this case is a good thing.  I mean, I really enjoy getting these things for my one of my Best Friends and I am glad that there isn’t sadness attached to it.

I also stopped by JoAnn’s Fabrics!  I picked up a pattern for baby slings.  So that is my next project just as soon as I finish this blanket and I am very excited to be making it.  The only thing is that I have an idea of how I want the fabrics to look but there are soo many choices.

I’ll jot some ideas here.

I want to do a bamboo fabric shell- easy breathing, easy care- in like a chocolate brown.  Now its the inside lining I am conflicted about!  I want a pattern that has slate blue, lime green and the chocolate color.  I’ve seen some great patterns in paisley and polka dots as well as some great geometric patterns.  Then I saw the Toile and it made things that much harder to decide. So I walked out with the pattern (which was a full five dollars cheaper than I thought it was going to be- yay!) but no fabric.  I have decided to look online and this has become a problem of too much choice.  Who’da thunk it?!  I mean I thought I was pretty specific in fabric and pattern but apparently it still isn’t narrow enough.

Ohh I almost forgot! While I was in the Commissary I got a phone call from the clinic telling me that I need to reschedule my beta draw because the 26th has turned into a training day.  So now my wait is the full 15 days and my draw is on the 29th at 2:50.

It’s gonna be crappy timing should the test be negative.  That is the week we go home for the family reunion. Dealing with the disappointment as well as a period could be hazardous to the health of many members of my extended family.

Anyway, this is kind of long.  Tomorrow I am going to attempt a light hearted post.

thanks for reading!

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One Comment leave one →
  1. June 19, 2009 7:03 am

    People are SO FRIGGIN RUDE. Sheesh.

    I completely completely sympathize with the evil clomid issues. I hate that drug with an everlasting passion. After Femara, I never went back.

    And the ta tas? Oh how I relate. Mine would go crazy during that time. And I’m normally a D and am right now a DD. Lovely eh? haha. Wait til people start telling you they’d love it if THEY were a D. Uhhuh. I say try it. 😉

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