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Just Some Thoughts

September 20, 2007

So I am feeling just a little bit ashamed of myself.  For some faith inspiration I read Job.  That man of such faith.  And I am ashamed because my situation is of no comaparison and yet I have such issues of faith. I am not really ashamed that I question God, not that I curse this forsaken situation that I am in, but that I have come so close to losing my faith.  I never completely lost my faith and I never cursed God but I do wonder if I disappoint God.  It certainly doesn’t surprise Him, but you don’t have to surprise anyone to disappoint them.   I must say though that reading Job helped me to understand that God is God and I sometimes just have to accept that in my faith some of my questions will go unanswered–while others will be answered in ways I never anticipated.  It also re-enforced that it is perfectly alright to question God and His motives because Job does—never cursing God or turning his back on Him.  He questions the Lord while remaining faithful–and that just showed me that my faith doesn’t have to be blind. 

There are more thoughts along those lines that I can’t quite put into words at this point since it is the middle of the night.  Maybe I’ll get back to it later.

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